Tag Archives: sewing

Rainy, Snowy May Day

Posted on by
Reply

May 17th. I woke to another snowy morning which turned into a rainy day. It’s hard to feel any hope for anything these days. But the moisture is welcomed. The garlic is loving it. The windows are getting washed without me doing anything. So never say there’s no hope. There is always hope. We just have to work to make it happen.

This morning reading the 2 Heathers, I almost cried over what is happening down south in the USA. One Heather reported on Kash Patel taking a VIP snorkel at USSA Arizona, a Pearl Harbour military cemetry. Both writes of the Selma march for black voting rights. Heather Cox Richardson gives a very detailed history account of the fight for voting rights for the blacks. The fight still has to go on in 2026. This is the part that makes me cry. We are still defined by the colour of our skin.

This is where I am on this rainy/snowy day. I am sleepy and lethargic. I feel discouraged with my weight loss effort though it is barely a week. I almost gave up with the black tea/coffee. I longed for a cup with cream and honey. I said almost. I didn’t give in. I feel small, small results. I’m not feeling as bloated. I’m ok with 1/2 cup cooked rice with my meals and smaller meat portions. I’m doing the veggies. I will hang in for another week and then see.

I’m not making huge progress in other areas either. I’ve long abandoned #the100dayproject of sewing log cabin quilt blocks. My Bernina sewing machine sits idle on the table with my mess of fabric scraps. I’ve been meaning to tidy all that and more but somehow it hasn’t happen. That could be my 100dayproject. I will start it today. I am going to start it today.

A Reset

Posted on by
2
Photo by Jose Antonio Gallego Vu00e1zquez on Pexels.com

I can only handle my negative, grumpy depressive self for so long. Then I have to turn myself off and reset, hoping to get a more positive and cheery mood. I do have one rant for today. Why does Donald Trump demand that Iran can never have a nuclear weapon. It is the country that is being attacked by the U. S. and Israel. Both these countries and others have nuclear weapons. Why not drop some bombs on them? It’s my simple mind asking a simple question.

I’m feeling a little more positive and not quite so grumpy. I can let go a little on the Iranian war and the Epstein files. I am tired, mentally and physically but I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve felt I’ve been in a tunnel, struggling in the dark the past 2 years. I can let go of the struggle and try to appreciate the joys that are here right in front me.

My bitter melon seeds have sprouted, all 8 of them. I am programming for a large harvest so I have enough for our coffee friends at the mall. The Chinese greens have emerged in the greenhouse along with the spinach and lettuce. It’s an indication of more good things to come. Meanwhile downstairs, my Bernina 790 is waiting to be fired up and get going with my log cabin quilt squares. My palette has been idled for over a year. The paints are probably dried. I hope the liner is not moldy and rotting.

It is time for a rescue, cleaning and resetting of everything. Too many dust balls in corners of my head and everywhere. The deadline for the hateful tax return is looming nearer and nearer. I have to move my ass to find all those annoying pieces of paper and put them together. It’s my own small private war every year. I have no time to waste.

Slow Living

Posted on by
2

It is March 8th. It rained this morning. It is day 15 of #the100dayproject. I have been working a little on it each day. My cold is still hampering me. I can’t go great guns with anything. However, I am happier with this slower pace of living and sewing. I am enjoying the process more. I have 5 completed logcabin blocks and 2 partial ones. I continued to be my usual disorganized self, not having my fabrics sorted to darks and lights. I don’t have all the strips cut either. I am in continuous state of search for the best strip.

It is a grey dismal day.This world is going nowheres fast except maybe to war. I am astounded by this world we’re in, aren’t you? I feel as if we are in a fake reality show. The only trouble is, it is not fake. It is not a bad idea to stick my head in the sand, ignore all this madness and do the things that nourishes me. Wake me when it is all over.

I had coffee with my 94 year old father this afternoon. We talked about the times from way back. He still has a good memory. The very first house we lived in was behind the cafe. It was owned by the town doctor. The rent was $7/month. It had 2 rooms. The linoleum was peeling. The next house was by the highway, across from the railway station. It was owned by grain elevator company. The rent was $20/month.It was bigger but not really better. My foot went through the floor board in a bedroom.

It was good to have memories to share. We hadn’t shared or conversed much before. We had a laugh over the rent. Who would have thought I could do this with my father?

Working on Joy and Hope

Posted on by
Reply

It’s March 1, a new month and a new day, so they say. I woke up to the same world, full of bad news of Donald Trump and bombing in the Middle East. No overnight transformation of world peace and love. Whatever happened to the age of Aquarius? Where is the humanitarism and collective consciousness? Where has our conscience gone?

As you can see, I still am sick of this world. I am still a bit sick with my cold. It could be affecting my outlook. It doesn’t help that my iMac is not performing at its best. I am still working on improving my mood, trying to find some positivity and joy. I don’t want to add my negativity to the already existing toxic pool. This morning I found 2 inspiring stories. I should say they found me. I had not known or heard of these individuals before.

The first one was Margaret Anne Cargill. She was an heir to millions. Yet she lived a simple life and donated everything to charities anonymously. The 2nd person was Hamzah Jihad Furquani. He made 13 cents an hour as a prison janitor. He donated $17.74 of his earnings to relief efforts in Gaza. Their backgrounds were totally different but their hearts were the same, big and generous. Their stories are fascinating reads for me. They are real and not fake news. It gives me hope and inspiration in these dark times. I try a little harder to find and feel joy. I try a little harder to have a good day. The world is still full of good people. But we still need to acknowledge the evil, too.

I’m 8 days into the #100dayproject of sewing logcabin quilt blocks. My pace is slower, making a ½ block a day. The slower pace is more enjoyable. Here’s square #3 and #4.

100 Days of Frustrations or Squares?

Posted on by
2

Today is the first day of the #100dayproject. This year I am making another logcabin quilt for my sister. I will make a square/day for the next 100 days. Yesterday I spent time to clean and oil my Bernina 790 sewing machine. I need to prime and oil myself as well. I have almost one square done, but I am frustrated, hair standing on end. I haven’t organized or prepared my material. My work space is one big sunspeakable mess. I had to run and escape from all that.

I’m feeling stuck in emotional frustration as well as in physical chaos. What is wrong with me? No one is answering, offering any answers or advice. I must work through this all by my lonesome. It’s a forlorn journey. I think this is why when someone asks me for help, I am more than happy to lend a helping hand or a voice. Not having boundaries, I go way overboard. I would be the lifeguard who rescues someone drowning and takes him home with me instead of leaving him at the pool. It is too much. In due course I would get angry and lose my cool and things blow up and get messy.

Because I can’t say no and hurt people’s feelings, I end up doing that very thing. I hurt their feelings. Then I wonder what the hell happened? There, I’ve said it. I see it. I feel less frustrated and stuck. Maybe I can pitter, patter down to my chaotic sewing room, sort and organize and finish my one logcabin square. Wish me luck.

Crowbars and Sledgehammers

Posted on by
Reply
Photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels.com

I’ve been wrestling with my sewing machine for most of this cold morning. I’ve been wrestling with my soul along with my Bernina. I have such a huge guilt complex. I feel I have no sense of discernment. I lack social and relationship skills. I still feel that everything is my fault. It is hard to get a good night’s sleep or a peaceful morning. I should really learn to put up boundaries and a stopwatch on how long to ruminate. This is sapping the life out of me.

Still, I can look at these moments of worrying and fretting as tools of transformation. If everything was smooth as ice, I could just glide along without care. There would be no need for thought or self examination. These prolonged periods of suffering are hammering in the fact that I have to change. I am a slow learner. Pain is a powerful crowbar to open me up, to see what makes me to tick and what needs fixing.

I have fixed my sewing machine problem. I’ve watched numerous YouTube videos on how to unstick a stuck bobbin. I spent an hour and none of them worked. In desperation, I stuck my little screwdriver along the inside edge of the bobbin case instead of the little hole in the back. Lo and behold, it worked! Nevertheless, Bernina Jeff makes very good videos. I wonder where is a good place to crowbar me.

Same Time Last Year

Posted on by
3

Sunny Sunday at last! It’s a reason to cheer. I’m feeling a little more optimistic. I have my blue sweater, earrings and eyebrows on. I’m not moving any faster but breakfast and dishes are done. The kitchen floor swept. I have plans of picking up my knitting needles and starting another logcabin quilt. My sister said she would love one. It’s easier when you are making it for someone. Having projects is good for the heart and soul. And it is good to follow through and finish. So I shall work on following through to finish this Ultimate Blog Challenge.

I am feeling grateful on this Sunday remembering how far I’ve come from the same time last year. This time last year was the 3rd month after my mother had passed. I had tubes in my ears. I was still without much hearing but had alot of choral music and singing in my head. It drove me a bit batty. I felt cognitively impaired and exhausted. The good thing was I was able to sleep. It was in January that I started a daily journal, charting how I was hearing and the noise in my head. I stopped sometimes in June because I was too focused on my maladies. It wasn’t good for my mental or physical health.

This time last year I was stressed and distressed. I was surprisingly not depressed. I knew I had to be careful and not sink into those blues. I had to keep my spirits up to heal. I read Caroline Myss’s and Herbert Benson’s books on healing. I meditated on the word joy. I painted it. I walked to the mall, the Dollar Store, the Asian Market. I walked somewhere every day. Today I am surprised by how much I did this time last year.

I am rejoicing at this recollection of my warrior self. I still have it in me to ‘joy’ on. February is on the horizon. My 2026 100dayproject will be doing another 100 logcabin quilt squares. I better sharpen my rotary cutter, clean and oil my Bernina 790 sewing machine.

Books Not Read; quilt not finished

Posted on by
2

I’m in danger of a no show on this 23rd day of the Ultimate Blog Challenge. I thought I best sit my butt down and get to work. My mind is scattered, neither here nor there. Today I’ve been out for lunch with my retired cronies from work. We don’t see each other frequently so it can get lively and lengthy. Then an hour later, I’m out for coffee with my father and some of our Chinese friends. It’s no wonder I’m all talked out and not much left in my head.

This is the year of short attention span. The only thing that can hold my attention is serious murder mysteries on Britbox. I want to do better than that. I’m working on reading but I haven’t been able to finish one book in a very, very long time. I still take out books that catches my eye from the library and on Libby. They’re free. The library no longer fine overdue books. The books online disappears on their own when the time is up. So why not, even if I manage to read a few pages here and there. I can still gleen nuggets of wisdom and I can enjoy short snippets of a story. I don’t have to have the whole enchilada.

I discovered the word acedia from Kathleen Norris’s Acedia & Me. At present I’m working on her The Cloister Walk because I am interested in monastic life. I don’t know how far I will read. I need just tidbits. I was reading Angela’s Ashes. It was quite interesting but I’ve left it behind. I’ve also left behind The Swedish Art of Aging Exuberantly. Am I not already doing that already? I don’t think I need instructions. I haven’t cracked open Water Mirror Echo: Bruce Lee and the Making of Asian America yet. I will soon. I am on page 39 of Caroline Myss’ Anatomy of the Spirit.

_________________________________________

I did not have enough gas to finish my post yesterday. I’ve covered only a few of the books I did not finish reading this year. I am working on getting my head together. I went to Saskatoon Quilters’ Guild Show and Sale this morning and was blown away by all the creative quilters in our midst. I was especially impressed and inspired by Debora Barlow. She was the 2024 National Juried Show Best of Show winner with the quilt Weir Fishing.

Possibly now I am inspired enough to finish my log cabin quilt that’s been waiting for years for me to put it together.

GROUNDED IN THIS MOMENT

Posted on by
4

I’m enjoying puttering around the house on this cold day in Saskatchewan. We had a -1℃ last night. We have a few more ahead before it’s over. But our passive solar greenhouse is doing fabulously. It was 19.5℃ while only 2℃ outside a couple of hours ago. Now it has dropped to 17.3℃. It has been cloudy all day. I am learning to ground myself in household duties instead of crying the woes.

It was soothing to sew my quilt block this morning by the fireplace. I feel the warm of the fire. There is comfort in touching the fabric. I see the different colours and patterns. I hear the whir of my Bernina as it stitch the seam. I look up and I see my daffodils and tulips out the window. The cat is beseeching me to put in a geranium in its pot. Soon, kitty, soon.

It feels good to be in the moment, not to be scattered and distracted every which way. I’m learning to ground myself in the present moment, sewing in silence. I’m not listening to the radio, to the voices of happenings over which I have no control. I did listen to a couple of short video clips from Therapy in a Nutshell on grounding and other mental health tips. I’m a self-help addict and I’m always opened to learning how to make things better and easier for myself.

Today is a good day, despite the cold and the grey sky. I almost lost this post just now. I better quit while I’m still ahead for this 20th day of the Ultimate Blog Challenge.

WHEN EVERYTHING IS HARD

Posted on by
6

Do you have days when everything is hard? I seem to have more than my share of them and often. I’m sounding rather childish and petulant but it just doesn’t seem fair, does it? There’s no one to cry to about it. Everyone has their troubles. The only thing to do is to ‘buckle up, Buttercup!’ My plan lately is not to complain out loud about it, be calm and agreeable. It’s a good time to be quiet and go about life and business slowly and steadily. Brain surgery and complicated procedures are out of the question.

Sewing my log cabin quilt square is a good activity. I’ve pieced and sewn over 50 of them now. It’s familiar and soothing. It’s never boring. I always try for precision – exact 1/4 inch seams and colours that go well together. Even so, I’m a little behind with my squares these last few days. Fatigue and heaviness are weighing me down. I’m practicing not stressing, letting it slide off me. All schedules are my own creation. I’m never behind. Everything will get done in due time.

When I get feeling down too much, I remember Caroline Myss’ advice to get up and move. And so I do. I go for our daily walks. A change of posture, a change of scenery and a change in thoughts and mood. The day is sunny and warm. I open some windows in the house to get some fresh air. I have such a difficult time putting things away and in order. I work not in understanding but in doing it. So I take the laundry off the line, fold them and now they’re all put away. It really wasn’t hard once I started. I’m learning to tackle each seemingly difficult task, thus – step by step.

I’m always surprised that when I get up and start moving, I feel better. Even stepping outside on a cloudy day gives me a rush of relief. So doing even a very small thing is better than not doing anything. A small accomplishment leads to another accomplishment and so on and so forth.