AN EXTRA CUP OF TEA – Day 71 in a year of…

Day 71, October 1, 2016 @9:56

img_2952What is it about tea and me?  What is it about that cup of brew that brings so much pleasure and comfort?  Is it the pause it offers me – the time to put the kettle on and wait for it to whistle?  When it does, then pouring the hot water over the teabag, fishing out the bag, spooning in honey and powdered milk. Little pregnant pauses – full of deliciousness of time suspended.


img_5320Perhaps my next doing different could be learning/developing my own tea ceremony.  After all, I am Asian.  I came from the land of tea. I have a kimono.  I have a teapot.  I have tea.  My cupboard is filled packs of loose tea leaves from Sri Lanka – gifts from a friend.  I have been too lazy and too impatient to do the process.  My friend has discovered my laziness.  Now she gives me teabags from Sri Lanka.

My extra cup is finished.  I meander but it is Saturday. It is October 1.  It is another new month, another new beginning.  It is reason enough to celebrate. It still feels like a special day off, a suspension from the cares of the week.  I shall relish it.  How are you spending this Saturday?




unravelling_300pxIt’s December 31, the last day of the year.  I am still working on Suzannah Conway’s Unravelling the Year Ahead.  I’m doing it in fits and starts.  I’m unsettled and restless. It’s difficult to unravel the past year, to take inventory, to face the numbers.

  • Was it a good year?  Did the good outweight the bad?
  • Was I happy?
  • Did I make any progress?


The hardest question to answer was this one:

Describe your favourite day, moment or occasion of 2014 in words and pictures. What did it taste like? Smell like? Sound like? Who was (or wasn’t) there? Where were you? What were you doing? What was awesome about it? And most importantly, how did you FEEL?

It’s not easy to answer when you don’t know yourself at all. I’ve spent most of my life being for other people. It’s not anyone else’s fault except for my own unconsciousness. Do you know that it is much easier to be there for others than for yourself? I had not known this till this very minute as the words fall from my fingertips.  It’s a funny thing, right?  Why? Who knows.  Maybe it is that vulnerability thing that Brene Brown talks about.

IMG_6003I never saw myself.  It’s no wonder that it’s difficult to know my favourite moment or occasion of 2014.  I had to put aside my lazy bone and dig deep and do the work. Nothing came for a day or two.  But today, I’m remembering and feeling.  Lake Havasu in February was pretty damn nice.  The arid landscape and desert air proved to be wonderful for body and spirit.


It’s January 1, 2015.  Looking within myself is hard work as you can tell.  I had abandoned my post yesterday, interrupted by New Year’s Eve.  It was hard to dig underneath the surface to unearth the layers beneath.  What was it that I loved about Arizona? Perhaps I should leave it for another day.

IMG_1628_4In the meantime, I realize last night is another favourite and last moment of 2014. I am so happy that I made the effort to make it happen.  What better way to bring in the new year than with champaign from France and with people you love?  The pop of the cork. the lovely bubbles tumbling from bottle into glasses, filled me with memories of love and families.





I am not sure why I reach so far and hard for things out of my reach.  There are so many good things close at hand, but somehow things beyond my grasp are always more attractive.  You know the saying, The grass is always greener on the other side.

So I struggle and reach for that thing up there and over there to no avail.  All I get is an ache in my back and in my neck, not to mention the frustration of the unattainable.

I have learn my lesson for now, till the next time.  I know there will be a next time.  There is always a next time.  That’s how I am, an imperfect human being.  Now, I will let go of the struggle.  I will appreciate what’s here, ease the pain in my back and neck.  Life should not be a struggle.  It is a celebration.