HELP OR HINDER

Just like that our heat wave is over. Not only that, it’s now cool. I woke up to 12℃ this morning, whereas only a couple of days ago I went to bed with 30℃. Life is like that now, swinging from one extreme to the other. Sometimes there is a short almost normal in between. Now is the time to pay attention and try to live the best rest of my life. I do need alot of help. My attention span is the size of a gnat. Can you believe that I paid my property tax twice this year? How inattentive can I be, especially when I do make written entries of paid bills. If I had only glanced up a few lines….

But not to worry. The city will probably send me a refund cheque or I won’t have to worry about paying next year. Do you know how hard it is to speak to a real person on the phone these days? I was lucky the first time I called the city when I was alerted that I had made another payment. It was first thing in the morning and a person came on the line after a few prompts. He told me to call the bank to have them stop payment because it hasn’t shown up on his end yet. But he could see that I’ve already paid up. I wasn’t so lucky calling the bank. No real person came on the line. No luck for me either at the bank in person. They could not stop payment. It had already gone through and because I had paid online, they can’t do anything.

All of this had cost me some time. It’s my own fault really for not paying attention to what I was doing. It cost me more time phoning the city back. Now all I can get is a recording about their high volume of calls and to visit their website. On emailing them, I was informed that they are experiencing a high volume of mail and not to expect an answer for 5 business days. If it is urgent call the telephone line! Round and round we go. It’s almost 5 business days since I’ve emailed the city. I have not heard from them yet.

It is helpful to pay attention where and when we lose time and energy. Most of us spend too much time and energy online and scrolling on our phones. The last few days, it’s cost me both, trying to fix my Fitness app. I still can’t log onto it doing everything I’m suppose to – even enlisting help from my fitness center. I’ve decided not to phone the helpline. I’m sure I will get a recording prompting me to press this and that. So while technology can help us, it also can do the opposite. It’s up to us to be mindful of how we use our gizmos.

I am glad to have stumble onto Chris Baily’s The Productivity Project. It came at a good time. The thing is I’m just reading it and not doing the assignments as he recommends. So I’m backtracking to make the lessons stick. Here are 4 tips from the project:

  1. Consume caffeine strategically, not habitually.
  2. Work on your hardest, highest return tasks at your peak energy time of day.
  3. Focus on one task at a time. Multitasking is simply less productive.
  4. Compartmentalize email and social media to specific times during the day.

I know these tips are really helpful. I did a caffeine fast for a week. I felt more relaxed and things tasted a lot better after. No. 2 is what everyone recommends. The hardest task requires more energy and focus. Multitasking screws up my mind and I make more mistakes. Limiting time on social media and online makes me feel more restful and peaceful. I’m not exactly that at the moment. I have been very busy during the heat wave to keep all our gardens and greenhouse watered. It didn’t leave me much spare time. Now is my unwinding time.

CHOP SUEY SUNDAY

Sunday, a day of rest – supposedly. Since I’m retired every day could be a day of rest. I haven’t found it so. I’ve lost my knack for idleness. I hope to tap my way back to my chaise lounge. I used to be so good at languishing and contemplating my navel. Oh dear! What has happened to me? Can I get myself back?

No use in crying over lost skills and spilt time. I should focus my attention here and write  this post for day 26 of the Ultimate Blog Challenge. I get myself all a-jittery shifting my attention to one thing, then another. What I need is something like a cattle chute or Temple Grandin’s hug machine. Oh, great! Now I’ve diagnosed myself with autism as well as ADHD. I guess if the symptoms fit, I might as well learn and work with them. It might be of benefit in the grand scheme of life. I wonder if Sheba’s thunder shirt would work for me.

In the meantime, on with the post. It must get written. Sunday is our morning of sourdough pancakes. I feed Oscar (my sourdough starter) daily for that purpose besides making bread. I like mine with just one fried egg and smeared with just a tad of maple syrup. I look forward to them as much as my occasional whole enchilada breakfast at A&W (2 fried eggs, 3 breakfast sausages, brown toast and hash brown) after my Saturday morning swim. It’s like a winter getaway for me. AND it’s much cheaper than going to Mexico or Cuba, even if it’s an all inclusive.

I’m cheap to keep if I need to be kept. Lunch is on in the Instant Pot. I’m making chop suey soup. Chop suey means a little bit of this and a little bit of that. I opened the freezer and found a bone and 2 slices of ham. In the fridge was some leftover roast beef, wilted celery, 3 still plump mushrooms and a couple of carrots. They all ended in the pot with a few other items and some water. The lid is closed. I pressed the soup button and and 75 minutes. Now we are minutes away from eating.

Did you know that Canada is a chop suey nation? There’s a Chinese cafe in almost every small town in Saskatchewan/Canada. I had a mission of visiting them this summer but only managed one. Someone else already had that idea and written a book about it. It’s called Chop Suey Nation if you are curious. It’s my story and every Chinese immigrant’s who or whose parents had a cafe. So much for writing today. Onto some other chop suey. Here’s a fun video to take us out.

 

SWEATING ALL THE STUFF

I have a confession to make. You probably know what it is already. I don’t handle stress or change well. I sweat over the small and big stuff. I go into distress and fret mode. I obsesse about it. I exert more energy than it is necessary. I tire myself out. I’ve been observing and paying more attention lately. It’s a by product of my morning meditation that I’ve come back to. If you listen to a recording enough times, the drill comes back to you. So I hear Mark William’s or Jon Kabat-Zinn’s voice telling me to sit erect, at attention, being in the present, watching as each moment unfolds, with no need to change anything.

I find their voices and instructions very comforting. They play in my head as difficult thoughts and situations come up. I tell myself to take each moment as they come. What do I need to do in this moment,  the next moment and the next one, to make things work for me? It is in the breaking things down in small do-able steps. It frees me from being immobilized with overwhelm. Then I can problem solve and see that it is not that difficult. I am not efficient at it yet. I still first go into overwhelm. I am stuck. I breathe and then the instructions play in my head. Then I do one step, then 2, 3 and so on.

Man, life sure is tough though. I relive this scenerio time and time again. I think this is for life. I see it as a thought in a cloud, drifting by my window. It is passing. There is no need to do anything but observe. And so another day in this challenge of living my life.

RITUALS AND HABITS

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This morning the sky is overcast, but the leaves are still the greenest green and I am a shade paler than blue.  I have been caught unaware by ‘forces’ and inattention.  I have allowed myself be invaded by energies of not my liking.  Perhaps I am talking too much, revealing too much.  I am being vulnerable.

So what?  I am, after all, just a mortal being.  And if I have all these feelings and experiences, there must be other people going through similar things.  And if no one talks and shares, we will be isolated like islands in the stream- with no Dolly Parton to sail away with.

I am working hard to bring myself back to center.  I am paying attention and setting intentions.  It is those rituals and habits that save the day.  One of my favourite phrase from Regina Brett is:  Get up, dress up and show up.  I remember that on mornings when getting up is hard to do.  You see things in different perspective when you’re up and standing tall.  So when I remember, I change my point of view…like changing my walk route with Sheba.  I do get lost sometimes by going in a different direction.

Getting lost is not a bad thing.  Getting lost makes you slow down and get your bearing.  You focus, you think, you observe, you see.  I see that I don’t have to rush and find the answer right away.  I see that I have time to breathe, to look around, to find my directions, to find me.

So this morning I got up, dressed up and showed up.  I made my cup of tea and did my qigong exercises, throwing out my stagnant chi.  I focused and felt my energy field.  I set my intentions.  I breathed.  Everything is copacetic.

ATTENTION, INTENTION, GENEROSITY, GRATITUDE

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I have come to the conclusion that Sheba has a divine purpose in my life.  She is here to show me how to live….that is that I must start each day with attention, intention and joy.  I must leap forward each morning with generosity of spirit and gratitude in my heart for all that I am and all that I have.

Every once in awhile, I catch glimpses of how perfect and wonderful our universe and my life are.  It’s like a jigsaw puzzle with all the pieces falling into place.  I feel a stillness in the air and I know that I feel God’s presence.  He comes to me every once in awhile, in those magic moments and I am awed and gratified.

THANK YOU for all that there is and all that I am.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

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Farewell to 2012!  You have been generous and kind to me.  It has been a year of adventures and rewards.  Thank you.  I am grateful for all that have come my way.

Hello 2013.  I am ready for you.  Today is a new day, a new year.  Each moment is a gift and each day is to be blessed with my intentions and attention.  Waste not in the dramas though all the world is a stage.  Let me write a script worthy of me and let me not dwell in the past nor daydream about the future.  Let me live in this moment of my life.

A TOAST!  HAPPY NEW YEAR!