Tag Archives: swimming

NO MORE FLOUNDERING

Posted on by
4

I always look forward to my Saturday morning swim no matter the weather. It was a chilly -8 Celsius at 7 am. The petunias are maybe blooming their last hurrah. They have done well, cheering and showering me with their brightness into October. They have earned their rest.

As always, it is relaxing and restful to glide into the pool and let the warmth of the water wash over me. More so when I have the luxury of a lane to myself. I can just swim back and forth at my own pace. I don’t have to worry about anyone grabbing my toes because I am too slow.

I went into the fast lane as it was the only one empty. It was on the opposite side of where I am used to – the slow lane. There is always something different for me to work up to. Even the flow of the water felt different. It was all good though. I practiced at accepting and working with all these ‘differences’. I tried not to  worry about a fast swimmer arriving and kicking me out of the lane. When I worry and panick, I flouder. I would get water up my nose. Then I would be coughing and struggling more.

Today, I worked at not panicking and floundering. Ok, I tell myself. I have a right to be here. I stilled my thoughts. I stopped thrashing around. I slowed my kick and swam steadily up and down the lance. No one booted me out of the lane.

DROPPING THE SHOE

Posted on by
2

IMG_2253We live in the age and environment of fear and anxiety. We are bombarded with news of shootings, beheadings and terrorist acts.  I hear the whining of sirens almost every day.  But there comes a time when a person has to let go of her all fears and anxiety – just let that damn proverbial shoe drop.  Let it do what it may.  Will it shatter like Humpty Dumpty so that not all the king’s horses and all the king’s men could put it back together again?  In that case, maybe we can just buy a new shoe.

I’m dropping that shoe – again.  I’m letting go.  Sheba has been absorbing my bad vibes and barking and whining at invisible shadows.  Like mistress, like dog.  I need to accept the dark as well as the light.  There are no bogeymen.  It’s only the tricks of our wandering minds.

I’m learning to drown my fears in the pool water, in those warm arms that hold me like my mother’s womb.  I let it embrace me, caress me, loosening fear’s grip on me, washing it away.  I feel no fear as I float, my face in the water.  There is no hurry or worry.  I will not sink.  I will not drown.  There is time to breathe.  I’m blowing out what I don’t need. I’m breathing in precious air.  It flows in my mouth and nose, fills my lungs and nourishes me throughout.  I am moving  up and down the length of the pool without effort and fear.  It is enough if only for that time and space.  Tomorrow I can do better.