rabbit hole

MONDAY – ANTIDOTES FOR A CLOUDY DAY

The day feels wintry without the sun. I am glad that I had my online class on Mussolini to focus on this morning. It is a cloudy day and the world is full of troubles. It would be easy to fall into the rabbit hole but I think it is already occupied. It seems like we have a resident rabbit in the yard. We’ve seen numerous tracks in the snow over the winter. We had 2 sightings of it yesterday, dashing across the garden in the morning. In the afternoon it was sitting by the pile of woodchips, perfectly still and pretty as you please.

It came to attention when I was taking its picture. The ears perked up and the head turned towards me. I thought it was rather plump so must have had a good winter. Then someone pointed out it could be a she and pregnant. If so, I wonder where the babies would be. On googling I find that rabbits make shallow holes under the ground to make a nest for birthing. I shall have to keep an eye out for bunnies in the yard.

A cool cloudy day calls for comfort food. A stew from a left over beef roast is the perfect answer. A few celery stick, carrots and potatoes thrown in the Instant Pot during the class break and dinner was ready before noon. The sun did make a showing as the day pass. It took awhile for the greenhouse to heat up. It was 4.7℃ there at 7:19 am. Outside it was -4℃. Now it is 4:30 in the afternoon. The sun is still out and it is 7℃. The greenhouse is 25℃. I did not open any vents today. wanting to keep the heat in for the night. I took pleasure standing in its heat and light to brighten my day. Today I needed a little extra help. The Buddhas are sitting on guard outside, waiting patiently for the first showing of garlic.

AIM FOR SUCCESS

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The days are getting shorter and cooler.  It’s harder and harder getting out of bed in the morning.  There is this heaviness in my body and mind.  That is my awareness when I wake up in the morning nowadays.

I did not step out of bed till eight this morning.  But I still did better than the sun.  It did not show its face till nine!  And then it hid itself behind clouds as if saying, Oh no, not today!  I am tired.  Just can’t do it.

Mr. Sun, I know exactly how you feel.  I am feeling YICK!  I don’t feel like getting out of bed, never mind doing anything.  But part of my mind recognizes that it is the time of the hibernation season.  It is too bad that we can’t be like bears and sleep the winter away, curled up warmly in some cave.

We are not bears and we cannot hibernate.  We have to rise and shine somehow, even if only dimly.  I’m remembering that I’m suppose to write a novel in November, 50,000 words in 30 days.  Well, it’s only some 1700 words a day.  What’s the big deal?  Nobody is saying that it has to be a bestseller, or that it even have to be good.  It just have to be written.

Somehow that makes me feel better.  I’m thinking, too, that even if I can’t write 1700 words a day, I could try for a 1000.  That is the goal of this little blog – a thousand and two words a day.  So far that goal have not been reached.  But wait just a cotton picking minute!

I cannot think like that.  I am already setting myself up for failure.  Why not aim to succeed from the word get go?  I WILL not compromise or booby trap myself into failure before I have even started.  How often have I done that to myself?

Look at how far I’ve come so far.  Tenacity is in my genes.  I love words and have been told I have some talent with them.  I have two blogs to show for it.  I can work on imagination.  I just need to get my head out of linear thinking and into possibles.  I CAN.  I CAN.  I CAN.

I am the woman who can!  Alice still lives here.  Now where’s that damn rabbit hole?  I need to fall into it and come out and see what’s on the other side.