Tag Archives: insights

Start Where I am

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Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

I’m back, trying to tap out a few words, a few thoughts. It is not easy. It is damn difficult starting…anything. It’s torture actually trying to find an opening. So, I’ll just start where I am. It is almost April. I’ve signed up for the April Ultimate Blog Challenge. Challenges have a way of giving me a boost. I’m warming up and flexing my fingers for the keyboard. I need not be clever. I need not be profusive. I just need a few thoughts and a few sentences.

Life has been bumpty, with more than just a few twists and turns. I’m not here to tell sob stories but they might spill out just the same. I’m here to get out of those ruts and puddles and back to the flow of life. I’m hoping to tap out some insights and solutions. I’m hoping to get back some oomph. I’ve been a dishrag for too many months now. I don’t wear dishrags well. I hope to inspire myself.

While I was dumbstruck this morning, I seeded some kohlrabi and cabbage. I soaked some bitter melon seeds for easier germination. Then I washed some dishes. It’s better to do something, anything rather than being stuck motionless. Now I’m on the way. I’ve broken the ice. I hope my words will flow for the April writing challenge.

THE SPACE – VIKTOR FRANKL – Day 264 in the year of….

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Day 364 – July 27, 2017 @1:48 pm

Here I am again, showing up once more on this second last day to my year of. It is not easier. What stays true is nothing happens and nothing said till I make my first tap – a letter, a word, a sentence, a paragraph.

My head is not quite as full and heavy today. Getting the thoughts out in print helps to clarify things for me. That’s why I tap. I’m voicing my sighs, groans and moans of aches,pains, irks and whathaveyous. A glimpse of insight sometimes follow. And I go, ‘ah, how interesting, Watson’,  followed by a slow smile.

Sometimes insight comes on its own wings. Yesterday Viktor Frankl spoke to me:

Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.

I think he was trying to save me time. He was pointing to the most important lesson of my year. I’ve gotten that point before. It’s just that I keep losing it over and over. THE SPACE is it. It is there for all of us. It can be a moment or two but is so powerful when recognized. It can feel like an eternity where we can do so much in just that moment.

I am so happy that Viktor whispered it. I saw it before my eyes last evening at supper. And I gave it voice. Remembering the moment now gives me peace. My forehead is smoothed of wrinkles. My head feels lighter. I am in the space.

RETURNING – day 106 in a year of….

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Day 106, November 8, 2016 @10:49 am

img_8338The morning is grey.  I bring myself back to this space to dispel it.  I’m returning to my journey of making changes in a conscious way.  If I don’t, they will happen to me willy, nilly.  Better to go into them with eyes wide open.

I sat with Timothea Goddard’s session of the Mindfulness Summit 2015 to review the 3 insights from practicing mindfulness and cultivating kindness.

  1. Pain can’t be avoided.
  2. Everything is impermanent.
  3. The self – the me, I, mine is always changing and not permanent.

In short you can sum the insights up as life sucks, everything changes and don’t take anything personally.  If I can really accept the first two and learn to live the third, life could be a lot easier.  And it is.  I have been practicing.  Sometimes I have become distracted and wandered off.  I’m learning to come back and come back more readily and often.  I’m less inclined to throw up my hands and say, I CAN’T do it!

This morning I’ve returned to the task of clearing my work table in the basement. It was not hard.  It was not easy.  It felt unpleasant.  I stood and felt my avoidance/nausea for a moment, not knowing where to start.  Then I just plunged in, opening an envelope, a shoebox, taking out papers, shredding them, bagging them.  I let the feelings be.  I did not try to chase them away.  Then an understanding of what they are/why they are came.  It was okay.  I was okay. It was like what Oprah calls peeling an onion.  I’ve peeled the first layer, the beginning of an opening.  It is enough.  I will return tomorrow.

What box have you opened today?