Tag Archives: the mechanics of doing

NO PAIN, NO GAIN

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December 1, 2018 5:18 pm

I’ve been absent for a few days, wrapped up in my table cloth and my Bernina embroidery machine. I did not think I would like programmed creativity but I have fallen in love with it. I sit and watch how the needle is travelling back and forth and across the cloth. I listen to its soft rhythmic chug chug, like the marching of tiny feet across the hoop. It is soothing, mesmerizing and addictive. I’m just realizing what an awesome machine I have. It has amazing capabilities. I’m just past the beginning where I can make it go. There’s so much more to learn. I hope I have enough time.

It’s the first of December. How time flies. It’s almost a year since I got my Bernina. I shall not lack things to do this winter. I will have no time to mope or despair. The mechanics of how to use all its features will crowd out all the garbage of my mind. I will be emptying all old and corrupt files and opening new ones. I will fill them with optimism, joy and all things good. I hope all the new activities will help me grow more grey matters and telomeres.  I hope my mind will be more peaceful and I can think better. I hope it will help me to be a better person.

This morning was tough. It was dark as can be. It’s Saturday, my swim day. My body and mind were in unison, crying their pain and reluctance of not wanting to go. I overrode them both. I did not listen to them. I chanted: Got to go. Got to go. in my head. I knew that once out the door I will be fine. I felt the pain but thought of the gain. I thought of the warm water enveloping me as I step into the pool and glide down its length effortlessly. And so it was. I was relaxed and weightless. My backstroke was perfect. I felt the pull with each reach of my arms. I thought of Bruce Lee and his philosophy of ‘be like the water.’

 

FEATHERWEIGHTS AND OTHER OBSESSIONS

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November 20, 2018  7:49 am

Winter time and the living is not easy. The fish are not jumping. The mornings are dark. If I dwell in the cold and hardness of it, I would be done in. But I don’t. I’ve learned to concentrate on the mechanics of everything – how to get from point A to B, what I have to do if I want this, that and the other thing. It works. It’s magical. I’m transported from feeling icky to ___ . I can’t quite find the word but I feel my brain firing up like the furnace in the basement. Soon it will kick in and ideas and endorphins will flow. Ah, I hear the fan blowing. The warm air is blowing out the vents.

I’m finishing my second cup of tea. I will make a list of things my mother wants from Costco. She phoned yesterday to confirm. Are you going for sure. Will you remember? Don’t forget the barbecue chicken. She repeated the list. I mustn’t forget. Then I will make my own list. I mustn’t forget or get lost getting there. I get lost regularly going anywhere and everywhere. I don’t get excited about it any more but I could be a little more careful, pay more attention and look for signs and landmarks. I turn off at the exit for Yorkton.  It would save me time.

November 21, 2018  10:16 pm

I’ve let time and thoughts slipped away. It’s the latest I’ve come to this page in a long while. My thoughts are fragmented, scattered by the day’s activities and by my recent interest in the history of sewing machines. It was ignited by the book, Every Quilt Tells a Story by Helen Kelley. Her mention of the Singer Featherweight prompted me to look it up on the Internet. I was in love. One thing led to another and I was mesmerized by all the vintage sewing machines, even my own Kenmore Model 15813200. I bought it somewhere in 1972/73 for under $200.  It’s a long story. I better leave my mutterings here and head for bed. Tomorrow is another day.

November 22, 2018  8:47 am

Keeping a regular bedtime pays off for a good night of sleep. I think I took my obsessions of sewing machines into my sleep. I was dreaming of sewing different motiffs onto my quilt/table top I’m sewing along with catching a plane. I dreamt that we slept till almost 9 am and our plane was due to take off at noon. Yikes! My brain was busy even in sleep. My plan today is to embroider these birds onto to the quilt/table top. To embellish, I want to try out as many decorative stitches as I can on my Bernina. So I must not tarry and get on with things.

 

PERSIST OR DESIST

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November 14, 2018  8:33 am

It is an exercise class morning. I’m fed and watered, have vacuumed the living, dining and kitchen areas. I have a few minutes to tap out my thoughts. I try not to get too caught up in being obsessive about my routine. Moderation in everything still applies in this age of energy. I have to leave some time to vegetate and not measure time.

November 15, 2018 8:10 am

A second cup of tea with Sheba close by. My words and tapping are not coming easy this morning. I will persist for awhile – till the end of my cuppa at least. What is that saying? Persist or desist. Whatever does that mean? I will resist googling it. Perhaps you can enlighten me. However old habits die hard and I did googled. I found this website.

3:15 pm

I could not persist even to the end of my cuppa this morning. I had to desist my efforts. I could not force thoughts and words against their will. I am not so stubborn nowadays. I know when to stop bashing my head against the stone wall and pursue other avenues. Serendipity must have been at work. I chose to watch Caroline Myss’ Reflection series on Initiations by Fire. The first session was on forgiveness, a difficult thing for alot of us. It is certainly for me. I hang on to every hurt like Sheba with a bone. It is something that I need let go of. I’m thankful I had the first initiation.

7:30 pm

Today is not an easy day. Disjointed thoughts and words dominated. I changed activities and directions often. I do not have to stay in the quagmire of my thoughts and emotions. When lost and in doubt, I choose to be enthralled in the mechanics of doing. And so, I tapped a little, read some, sewed some quilt squares and painted the discomfort away. Now it is time to say good night.