Tag Archives: swim morning

COME SATURDAY SNOW

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Come Saturday Snow

I’m looking forward to have a rest day tomorrow. I’ve had a full but good day. The prediction of a snow storm for the weekend was correct. I’m feeling the storm within. I’m feeling Caroline Myss’s statement of what is in one is in the whole. What’s in the universe is in me. It is a heavy feeling. I hope it passes soon.

I was happy to get my Saturday morning swim back. All the better that it is an hour later than the pre Covid time of 8 am. It wasn’t exactly a crowd but there were 4 more bodies than my previous pool all to myself. It is rather sad that it took a pandemic to make people stay home and not go south of the border. We have plenty of good stuff to enjoy. Too bad for me though. I lost my own private winter pool. But it was good for me to share and to swim a little faster. Some people are nervous. I could feel their frenzy in the water. I was happy enough to step out after doing 18 lengths.

The snow started coming down heavier in the afternoon. I was glad to get to the library after my swim. Two of my reserved books have arrived – Brave New Medicine and The Art of Fermentation. Both have very good reviews. I love Michael Pollan’s forward in the latter. He describes fermentos as a most interesting, eccentric and generous bunch. I like to think of myself belonging to such a group. To date, my fermentation adventure includes making sourdough bread and pancakes, yogurt, kimchi, kombucha and fermenting beans and Jerusalem artichoke. It is very rewarding. The book promises more.

Looks like winter and snow is going to stay. I don’t really mind. The snow makes everything look clean and lightens up the darker mornings and earlier evenings. We got our greenhouse finished just in time. It’s a good thing I rescued the little onions from the garden yesterday. It’s something already a little green I can plant in the greenhouse. Today I thought of the geranium and some succulents that can tolerant some cold. And I seeded some radish. The passive solar greenhouse is a total new thing to us. It is fun to experiment to see what can and cannot be done. What I could lose are a few seeds and plants. I will gain much fun and knowledge. It will all fill my spirit.

THIS IS WATER

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September 8/20

I cancelled my swim this morning. I’m trying to find a good reason for it besides not wanting to. The not wanting should be good enough but the mind feels guilty. To assuage the guilt, I’m showing up here. God formid that I should waste time laying around, eh? Today would be a good day for it. It was -2 C when I woke up. But it’s toasty warm here in my space. The sun is shining through the recently washed windows. I’m happy sitting here and tapping out thoughts and feelings.

I’m not all about cancelling and lolling around though that’s how I feel most of the time – lacking motivation and energy. It seems that my feelings and how I see myself can be false. It’s part of my physicality. Now that I am aware, I can work with it. I need not trash myself so much. When I am in the state of not ‘wanting’ to do stuff, not much can come out of it even when I push and push. I learned that the hard way in the water, trying to do the breast stroke. I struggled with perfecting techniques. It was a hard and slow going. I felt like a turtle inching my way down the lane. My back ached. Then I had a thought. Why don’t I just be with the water?

The thought was triggered by memory of David Foster Wallace’s commencement speech, This is Water. I don’t know why it came. Maybe it was because I was in the water. Funny how things pop into my head. They travel through the air. It’s really light bulb moments literally. I appreciate them very much. Otherwise, I would be in the dark alot, not aware, dumber than a bunny. I read his speech again. It is an education and an understanding on how to think. And I am aware. I am in the moment. This is water.

September 9/20

I’m learning to date my visits here. Sometimes I leave posts not completed. Sometimes I don’t come back for days and weeks. My thoughts are left hanging. They get dried and lose meaning. I’m trying to improve. That is the essence of me. Self improvement is my middle name.

September 10/20

This is turning into a diary. It’s a good way of staying on track when I lose will and ambition and the power of memory is fading. I’m in a bit of a grouch. I wonder if it could be one of the side effects of the shingles vaccine from Tuesday. It sure is painful. My arm is still achy but I can raise my arm all the way above my head this morning. I don’t feel as flu like and miserable as yesterday – except for the grouchy part. I cancelled my swim again. I hope this is not me. On second thought, my arm is quite achy. I feel quite testy.