Tag Archives: hindsight

DAY 6 UBC DAYS OFF AND GREY’S ANATOMY

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Days Off and Grey’s Anatomy

This morning I was happy to languish a little and sip on my second cup of tea. It felt like a day off. There’s no swimming or aerobics class to dash off to. Of course every day is a day off now that I am retired from the rat race. Back in the days when I was still slinging bedpans, wiping butts and saving lives, our opening line to each other was: Are you on days off? Did you sleep? Our lives were as insular within hospital walls as those portrayed on Grey’s Anatomy.

When you are right in the middle of it, you don’t see what’s coming. You just live it. You think you will sort it all out – later. I knew enough though not to live it via the small screen, too, while I was still working. Once was enough. So now it is later. It’s a real pleasure to live it again through Netflix. I had forgotten the reason why I had only watched a few beginning episodes. I already had too much real life drama. No need for more. Time/days off was to get away from it all.

Now I see it. Now I see and understand how work had impacted on me. It’s taken 9 seasons of Greys Anatomy for me to see it. I am a slow learner. Hindsight is better than no clue. I can still learn from it. It’s still useful in my present time off. I can see how much alike and different Cristina Yang and I are. We are the yin and the yang. Maybe it’s because we are Asian sisters. We don’t like hugs and being mushy, I can identify with Meredith Grey, too, in that I’m a running commentary. Like Cristina and Meredith, I have my person. And that’s the best thing.

It’s nice to have days off even though I don’t punch a clock any more. It’s when I give myself permission to slack off a bit, sip my cuppa a little slower and just enjoy and not take myself so seriously.

P.s. We watch Grey’s most evenings with ice cream.

THERE’S ALWAYS A TOMORROW

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My cough goes on though less harsh and frequent. I’ve been distracted, obsessed and more than useless these past week.  Going into week 2 now. I might be hard on myself but that’s how it is. I’m also easier on myself than usual. I’ve dropped things, not keeping up, letting them go. However, my brain and thoughts keep beating on. That’s how I am. No use berating myself for being my natural self. I’ve already cursed myself enough for my past stupidity.

Yes, I know. I have to be kinder to myself. I am. There’s so much to be said for hindsight. Wisdom comes from living and making mistakes. When I know better, I do better. Now I do loving kindness for myelf. Hence, letting all insignicants drop from my shoulders while I try to rest and heal. Nature seems to know when it’s a good time. Both the guy and I had a stressful fall with our less than desirable neighbour. She knows how to create drama and then some. Somehow we moved through it. We had a walk to put in and the front yard to landscape. There was a lot of physical work and mental stress to push through.

We had a little reprieve after that.  Then Sheba came down with a big ear infection and hematoma. Two visits to the dog ER, 5 visits to the vet clinic in total. 3 ear aspirations. A stoned dog.  Then an anxious dog motoring around bumping into things with her head cone. Staying up all night with her.Going out with her numerous times in the middle night. No sleep for 2 weeks. It turned out well in the end. Sheba still has her ear. It looks almost as good as ever – just a tiny hard ridge at the tip. She is still as spunky as ever. The vetinary bill was not too bad.

We got through Christmas, then New Year. We had no time to get sick. But then, the guy got sick. I was very careful, avoiding, not overdoing, drinking lots of fluids, etc. But there was no getting away. We had absorbed all that stress into our body. I guess we had to let it pass through. That’s my theory anyways. I’m sticking to it. I hope I feel better enough to go to my Buddhusim class tomorrow. I’ve stacked up on Fisherman’s lozenges and I’ll take my hot water. It’s good for the cough. Cold water does zilch.

I’m thinking about getting the house in order. It’s my most pain in the ass. I’m not killing myself over it. I’m not doing anything at all. I hear Sheba shaking her ears. It’s almost her eating time. Will do that and then make myself a cup of tea and sit in the sun. Tomorrow is another day. It’s a good thing there’s always a tomorrow. The end.

DON’T WORRY, BE HAPPY

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January 11, 2019  6:45 pm

Life happens. Interruptions happen. Goals and intentions get redirected, altered or delayed. That’s how it always is. So why does it take me so long to see that? You know I like to dig to the root of things. But all I can find is a bunch of sayings about hindsight.

“It’s so difficult, isn’t it? To see what’s going on when you’re in the absolute middle of something? It’s only with hindsight we can see things for what they are.” 
― S.J. Watson

“To paraphrase Oedipus, Hamlet, Lear, and all those guys, “I wish I had known this some time ago.”
― Roger Zelazny

“We go through the present blindfolded… Only later, when the blindfold is removed and we examine the past, do we realise what we’ve been through and understand what it means. ” 
― Milan Kundera

I guess the moral of the story is in Bob Marley’s word is, don’t worry, be happy. Everything is going to be alright.

It makes sense to me. I will not search for reasons any more tonight. Who knows what the morrow shall bring? I shall finish my glass of wine and be happy. Good night for this 11th day of the Ultimate Blog Challenge.