Day 47, September 7, 2016 @6:49
Voices in the head are quite intrusive. Mine are. They tell me this is hard, that is difficult. They tell me after that I should have, could have. They make me feel lazy, tired and worse of all – guilty. They rob me of energy, time and well-being. Autumn is a vulnerable season for me with its shortened daylight and especially on cloudy days. I pay special care. Iquestion those voices in my head. I ask: Is that true?
The question gives me time for a pause and do a turn around. I tell those voices to be quiet. I tell myself I can do better. I can do that thing that they tell me is hard. I start. I move towards my goal. Once I start, I’m surprised to find that it wasn’t so hard afterall. If an unpleasant mood rises, I ask myself why and is it true. Can I feel another way? It’s that second of asking. It gives me time to change. Sometimes it doesn’t work. It’s not the end of the world. I feel what I feel. What isn’t done isn’t done. If I feel guilty about it, I feel guilty. I feel it until it goes away.
How was my day? I felt tired. I didn’t want to go out. I didn’t want to do what needed to be done. It gnawed at me. I went out anyways and did what I had to do. It felt good. While I was out, I ran into someone who made me realized how good living is and how much I have to be grateful for. If I hadn’t gone out, I would have missed that opportunity. I would have been sorry. Instead, I’m inspired again.
How was your day? Till tomorrow.