It’s getting late in the day. I haven’t put down any thoughts or words on this 5th day of April. I was flipping through one my many journals this morning. I found these two undated sentences.

“Even if you are justified, you must remain dignified. Failure is a rebirth to change.”

It seems that I’m always troubled, have always struggled and searched for a better way of being. There mustn’t have been a time when life was carefree. Surprisingly enough, I am experiencing a rare peaceful moment now. Ever since I have been working, my goal was Freedom Fifty-five, a slogan I picked up from London Life, my insurer at the time.

It is late again on this 6th day of May. Another failure. I didn’t quite finished my thoughts and words yesterday. It shows I’m more relaxed, not having the need to do everything, be everything. I’ve obtained another freedom – the need to be perfect. I don’t have to succeed in everything I do. Sometimes failure is the best thing. It can be a rebirth to change, to try different ways and different things. I did succeed getting to the pool this morning though. I swam my 10 laps. I’ve lost my lone ownership to it. I had to share it with 5 other people. I’ve had it all winter. I can share. The water is not quite as smooth and peaceful but I’m happy to have the company.



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