January 10. The Ultimate Blog Challenge

I drank too much coffee today. I forgot myself and didn’t specify that I wanted a decaf when I ordered my breakfast. Since they’ve already poured it, I didn’t want to make a fuss. When I went for a refill, I forgot again! I’ve been a little jittery since I got home. I’m drinking hot water like mad to flush it out of my system. I hope I can sleep tonight. There was a time when I drank coffee all day long at work, came home and had a large mug of coffee before bed and never think of it. Of course in those days of when I was a nurse, I never slept much. I took pride in how well I functioned on how little I slept. I’m sure that I was brain damaged then.

When I retired in 2013 I crashed. The sleep deprivation, stress and everything that was suppressed by fatigue all caught up with me. It took 3 years to catch up all the sleep I missed and to flush the caffeine, the stress and anxiety I had absorbed working in a hospital environment. I also took pride in how well I functioned having crashed so totally and heavily. How foolish and vain I was. Perhaps it’s that Chinese trait of saving face in me. It would have been easier and healthier if I had just stop, curled up and rested. But I guess that’s not who I was/am. Today I am still taking pride in striving, but I am more moderate and balanced.

I haven’t drank this much coffee since until today. I think I will be OK. It’s only 2 medium cups whereas in my younger golden days, it was many, many cups. It was my way of staying awake and on my feet. I still like to be alert and on my feet but I don’t need the caffeine to do it now. It’s fresh air and exercise. I had plenty this morning on the ski trail. It was early and I was all alone in a white winterland. It was beautiful. It was wonderful. It was marvelous.

Hmm. I’ve had another cup of hot water. I think I’ve tapped out much of my jitteriness. I think I will do some stretches to further relax me. I’ve been sharing thoughts and memories from 2011 this month. I will carry on the theme. Today’s share is on retirement.


Retirement has been on my mind for awhile now.  It seems like that is what we should strive for….all our lives.  There is this message to work hard so that one day in the far off distance, we can finally do what we REALLY want to do.  I don’t hear THEM, whoever they are, talk about doing the thing that we want now.  And why don’t we? 

I’m feeling that it is not yet my time to retire from my profession.  There is still things for me to do and learn within that framework.  And to tell the truth, I still love what I do.  I’m feeling power in that knowledge. I’m feeling a great sense of freedom….to do what I like and to stop when I don’t.  I’m rethinking what ‘work’, ‘retirement’ and life mean.  I don’t think one needs to stop working in order to have a life.  One needs to do what gives him a sense of worth, a sense of joy, accomplishment… have a life.  And of course, we need balance.  Too much of anything, even a good thing like work or leisure time, is not what living is all about. 

And do we ever truly retire…from life?  I hope not.  I hope that when I am ‘tired’ of, or not physically able to work my present profession, I will find another something or another that has given me so much in return.

10 thoughts on “TOO MUCH COFFEE

  1. Reading your post, I was reminded of my mother who drank coffee basically from the moment she woke up until the minute she went to bed. It was nice to think about her. I always feel when I do, she knows somehow that she is missed.

    I really like that you added your retirement statement. I too loved my job when I had it. We are so very fortunate to have had a profession that we loved and helped people. I hope you also find meaning in what you are doing in your post “paid work” life.

  2. I too use to drink a pot of coffee each day… plus a couple monster drinks!!! Uggg
    Now I am happy to have my one comfort cup in the morning, and occasionally an iced one from Tim’s.
    Thanks for sharing

  3. Lily, in grad school I knew a man who drank 27 cups of coffee a day. (How did he even keep count?) The good thing about your mistake this morning is that coffee is loaded with antioxidants, so you’ll be supported and oxygenated despite being too zippy. About retirement– I am glad you formally retired. I love my work (holistic coaching and energy healing) and left engineering long ago to do what I do. So I have no plans to retire, just continue helping people feel better.

    1. 27 cups! That’s a lot of coffee. My jitteriness wore off and I got a good night’s sleep.
      I am fortunate to be able to have retired – almost 10 years now. I had planned for an early retirement. I have no mortgage or loan payments and have a decent pension plan.

  4. Lily, to clarify, I’m glad you had the structural opportunity to retire, and hopefully you have retirement moneys. I’ve had the joy of satisfying work, but the money isn’t what many have at retirement.

  5. I love my coffee but my heart doctor has limited me to one in the morning and one in the afternoon. However, look at it this way, Coffee is a Nootropic so in moderation it can be a good thing. As it happens, my article today is on the benefits of coffee. Check it out if you have time. I also have an article posting in a couple of days about the benefits of Dark Chocolate, which is also a Nootropic. But like anything, moderation is the key. My wife is like you, she can not touch regular coffee or she gets the racing heart beat and feels very bad. Still, I need to remind her every once in a while when she goes to make a cup, to use the coffee substitute she has – it is made from herbs but taste a lot like coffee. Thanks for the article. Glad I do not live in snow country any more.

  6. Well, this is the second try – I don’t know what happened to the first comment but none the less, I have an article posting this morning about the benefits of coffee. It is a Nootropic when we drink it in moderation. That said, my heart doctor has limited me to two cups per day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon, and my wife can not drink even one cup or she climbs the walls. I enjoyed the article and the pictures, it reminds me of how nice it is to live in Mexico this time of year.

    1. Thanks for reading and commenting, William. I’m looking forward to your article. Luckily I was able to sleep last night. I drank a lot of water and I could feel when the caffeine left my system. And exercising outdoors helps.

  7. Your post’s title got my attention. Having worked for Starbucks I feel like there’s no such thing as too much coffee. But clearly, if you feel jittery, that was one cup too many.
    I like your thoughts about retirement. As long as you love what you do and have enough downtime, go for it!
    A dear friend passed away shortly before he planned to retire. He had worked so hard all the time, and he had all those plans what he wanted to do once he had enough time…

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