DOING THE WORK

It is the afternoon slump period. I’m trying to push through it with my tap, tapping at the keyboard. One load of laundry done this morning and drying outside. Another load is in the washer. Lunch is consumed and dishes done. It’s really not so hard. It’s establishing new routines and habits. I want to push through my lethargy and procrastination, adding one more thing each day so that doing becomes easeful.

I’m feeling that unease already, wanting to stop and get a cup of tea. It’s a delaying/procrastinating tactic and it works every time. At least I recognize it for what it is. Be back in a few minutes. Getting up will be good as I am feeling stuck and sleepy.

I am back. I do come back and trying again. While I was gone, I’ve brought in some of the laundry and have made my tea. I see myself doing these things. I see my thoughts as I move from here to there and back. I am learning to observe myself and my feelings as objectively as I can. Why do I feel __ , Why did I do __, Why can’t I ____,I ask myself these questions. I don’t like some of the answers. I ask anyways. Perhaps I’m finally doing The Work Of Byron Katie.  I’ve been gathering self-help information for decades. At last I’m doing the work.

Standing back away from myself, being an objective observer and asking the questions may be the way to being a better person. That is my goal – pursuing excellence in being.  I will put up with my discomforts and to come to this space. I’m finding the quiet and listening here encouraging. It creates a stillness in me and I hear the whispers of wisdom in the air. I could not hear them before. There was too much noise and unrest in my head. I am OK. I do not have to minimize myself, apologize or hide in the dark. I am big enough to stand in my own right/light.

About hafong

Hello! My name is (Leung) Hafong alias Lily Leung. You always say the last name first….that is the Chinese way. That is my partner lurking behind me. Since this is my blog, I won’t mention his name. But this is a rather cool picture. You see me and yet you don’t…sort of the way I feel about myself most of my life. So this blog is a self-exploration, an archeology dig of some sort. My tools…..words of a thousand or so at a sitting. I will try for that.
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2 Responses to DOING THE WORK

  1. Terry Fishman says:

    Boy Lily do I ever enjoy your blog. You write so well and articulate your thoughts and feelings to a point that I can feel your inner self. Much of what you write is so true and a reality for so many no matter age, gender, race, religion, status…..I could go on and on. I feel your triumphs and struggles as my own, I’m just in another part of the world! Keep it up!!! I am hoping to get a website going and to start blogging. I have struggles with my aging Mother and am coping with her Alzheimer’s, while I worry about maybe it going to get me as well as my father had it! But I am just carrying on and yoga and painting keep me sane! Take care❤️

    • hafong says:

      Thank you very much, Terry! Writing is a meditation to me. I’ve had trouble struggling with my mother’s physical health. I try to decide which is worse – their mental or physical health. Then I have a friend whose mother has alzheimer’s and a husband who has suffered a stroke like episode, a brother-in-law with MS and separated from her sister. She’s younger than me. I realize then that I’m pretty lucky. Yes, it’s good to have the art and exercise. Do get set up with a website. I started with blogger but I find WordPress easier to work with. I haven’t investigated further. Carry on and I will too.

      Lily

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