There was none of that comfy warm snuggling into the quilt this morning. There was nothing but the weight of the world on my soul and toxic thoughts making circuits in my brain. All that made me nauseous. I want to throw up. It was better to get up and put a stop to it. Though I think I know all the tricks to help myself, I still like to search for the perfect solution.
I know that everything feels worse than they actually are when I am in this mode. I do not fret much but I rather not be languishing in my misery either. So I do dress up and show up. I’ve even drawn my eyebrows in. No earrings yet. My house feels like a disaster. It feels as cluttered as my head. I’ve cleaned the upstairs and downstairs batheroom. Dusted, sprayed, wiped and gathered up the near empty cleaning solution bottles. I am not feeling better but I am working on it.
It cheers me to see videos of the people protesting in Minnesota. It’s good to see their passion for their rights. At the same time it disturbs me to see they had to go to that length and it still goes on. The memory of seeing Renee Good and Alex Pretti getting shot makes me sick. There’s nothing I can do except maybe turn off the news. Feelig sick and helpless does not help. Time for a coffee break. Tomorrow is another day.
onethousandandtwo 
Lily, I feel the same, literally nauseated. I have been following the antics of Harry and Meghan for amusement. But the British podcasts I follow have turned dark this week with the realizations of the depth of depravity of Andrew and how the royals- even the Queen- knew but didn’t pull him back at all until recently. How can we accept that these things go on, without feeling nausea? I pray. I roll my shoulders, drop them, and exhale. A friend is coming for tea this afternoon, and I need to clean my house and my attitude before then. Thank you for sharing that you are having morning sickness. You are not alone. Blessings to you.
Thanks, Kebba. I ran into someone from work whom I haven’t seen for 10 years at the grocery store. I’m sure we talked for an hour. That helped to break up my mood. She had lost a daughter in a motorcycle accident and her husband to a stroke. She’s younger than me. I’m sure she’s my angel in disguise. After our visit I went to a quilt shop and bought a walking foot and 4 bobbins for my Bernina sewing machine. Then coffee and Timbits with my father. It’s cloudy as heck here. Snow melting, releasing snow mold, I am sure. It’s ok. I’m feeling better.