Day 273 – April 27, 2017 @9:55 am

Now that I have made the return to my words, I need to heed them as well. I need to do as I say else they would be empty words. They would be like the emperor without clothes.

273 days in my journey of change, it is still easy to fall into the same faulty behavioral patterns that Portia Nelson talks about. It’s good to review her words again.

“I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost… I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes me a long time to get out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in. It’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault. I get out immediately.

walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

I walk down another street.”

I’m not as helpless and lost as I was at the beginning of the journey. I’ve been lost and had fallen into the same hole quite a few times. This morning I was right on the edge, teetered and stood my ground. Nope! I’m not falling in this time.

Practice. Keep on trying. Let go. Love. Be kind. These are some of the things I need to do over and over. It’s a meditation. It’s living. It is.