Have I been complaining a lot lately? I probably have but it’s been a hard year. When hasn’t it been? This little sabbatical of silence has been good for me. But now I’m having a little difficulty finding my words again. There is a price for everything.
A new year is beginning. The Year of the Goat starts tomorrow. Let me start by clearing out old hurts and wounds. Let me sweep out what no longer serves me today. No sweeping on New Year’s Day. You don’t want to sweep out the good along with the debris. I am very superstitious. I come by it naturally. I am Chinese. I believe in ghosts. I dream of ghosts. I see ghosts.
Did I tell you the demon found me again? He was knocking at my door. I heard the key turned. Click! I went oh-oh. Time to be viligant. I was grateful for the warning. I had time to prepare, arm myself and erect my fortress. Still, it was a tough time. But I have survived to tell about it. I am stronger and wiser for it.
I believe there are inexplicable (to us humans) forces out there. Some of them are beneign and some are not. Perhaps some of it is generated and sent out by people like you and me, unbeknown to ourselves. All I know is I am ‘sensitive’ to their presence. I have to trust myself in that knowledge and not label myself as a little eccentric and crazy.
The demon is gone. I can let go of the vigilance a little and be myself again. I have lost a few words but not chunks of my life. I have weathered the storm well with Sheba’s help. She has taken a few hits for me. Yesterday, she ran screaming from ‘it’ in fright, legs trembling so hard that all of her shook. All I could do was hold and stroke her till she quieted down. I hope that it is over for both of us. I need to make sure I have pulled our drawbridge up and our dragon is on alert.
We deserve a break and to rest in the sun again.